wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Randomize
