dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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