so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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