i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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