god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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