When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
