man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
