I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
