It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
