does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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