She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I just found puke in my bra..
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Randomize