I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Drunk is a universal language darling
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