I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
