Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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