gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Randomize
