she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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