Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
