Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
