My pussy is not your playground.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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