we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
