I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
