who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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