Michael Bay diarrhea
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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