We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize