another moral hangover. fuck.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
