Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
