I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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