girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
