I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Randomize
