whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
