the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
