How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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