marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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