why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
