If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
