I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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