Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
