So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
