you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
