And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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