just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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