"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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