"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
