That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Mom said you looked used
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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