no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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