We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
