So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
