Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
