I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
