i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
